🎃 Why We Love Being Scared (and When Anxiety Isn’t Fun Anymore)
- Jenny Beckman
- 3 days ago
- 3 min read
As I go on my daily walks around Crouch End, I can see the start of the hype of Halloween -who can decorate their house to be the most scary, shops full of all types of scary paraphernalia as many of us will seek out thrills—haunted houses, horror films, spooky stories. But this has got me thinking why do we deliberately put ourselves in situations designed to scare us? And why does that “fun fear” feel so different from the anxiety many of us carry in daily life?
Understanding the psychology of fear can help us see how our brains process threat—and why therapy can be so valuable when fear tips into overwhelming anxiety.
The Science of Fear
Fear is one of our most basic survival instincts. When the brain perceives a threat, the amygdala activates, triggering the body’s fight-or-flight response. Your heart races, muscles tense, and adrenaline floods your system.
But context matters. In a safe environment—like watching a horror movie—the brain knows you’re not truly at risk. That distance lets you enjoy the adrenaline without the danger. It’s fear, but with a safety net.
Why We Enjoy Being Scared
Psychologists suggest we seek out controlled fear for several reasons:
Adrenaline rush. The body’s stress response feels exciting in a safe setting.
Sense of mastery. Conquering fear—like making it through a haunted house—can bring pride and confidence.
Social bonding. Experiencing fear together strengthens connection (“we survived that scary film!”).
Escapism. A spooky story distracts us from everyday worries.
Fear vs. Anxiety
While Halloween fear is thrilling, anxiety is different. Anxiety is often fear without a clear or immediate threat. Instead of being a short burst of adrenaline, it lingers—often focused on “what if” scenarios.
Fear: Reaction to a clear, present threat (e.g., someone jumping out in a haunted maze).
Anxiety: Ongoing worry about uncertain or imagined dangers (e.g., “What if I faint at work tomorrow?”).
This difference is why haunted houses can be fun, but health anxiety, phobias, or generalised anxiety feel draining and exhausting.
When Fear Stops Being Fun
If fear starts showing up in everyday life—heart racing before work, dread before social events, endless “what if” spirals—it may be more than just nerves. Anxiety disorders affect millions and can interfere with sleep, relationships, and wellbeing.
Signs anxiety may need support include:
Avoiding situations due to fear of panic or embarrassment
Physical symptoms (tight chest, racing heart, stomach issues) without a medical cause
Constant “doom thinking” that you can’t switch off
Fear that feels overwhelming or out of proportion
How Therapy Can Help
Psychotherapy provides a safe space to explore the roots of anxiety and develop strategies to manage it. In therapy, you can:
Learn techniques to calm the nervous system when anxiety spikes
Identify unhelpful thought patterns that keep fear alive
Explore past experiences that may contribute to current worries
Build confidence in managing uncertainty
Fear may be part of being human, but anxiety doesn’t have to control your life.
Final Thought
Halloween reminds us that fear can sometimes be fun. But if fear has crept into your daily life in ways that feel heavy, exhausting, or isolating, you don’t have to carry it alone. Support is available, and therapy can help you reclaim a sense of calm and safety. To book your free 30 minute introductory call click here
Author: Jenny Beckman. MBACP, PG Dip Counselling and Psychotherapy
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